Personal Sonic Insect Repeller

Stand back mozzies! Sonic insect repeller coming through...

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This thingy was sold on

Tuesday, 21 March, 2017

and is no longer able to be purchased

This thingy is sold out and no longer available. Sorry if you missed out! We are unsure if/when this will be back.
  • Keep the mozzies away without you even moving!
  • Impressive range of 6 metres
  • Handy clip for your pocket or belt
  • Perfect for camping, fishing, picnics or working in the garden
  • Please note: We can confirm from experiments that it does not repel monkeys

Product Specifications:

  • Uses ultrasonic technology to repel insects
  • Clips onto your belt or pocket
  • 6m protection range
  • Requires AA battery: SB-2424.
  • Measures: 75(L) x 25(dia)mm

Shipping

This product requires extra lead time and is expected to leave our warehouse within 5 business days of purchase

Product overview

Jesus was walking through downtown Heaven the other day when a particularly persistent mosquito became somewhat enamoured with the body of Christ. "Why do mozzies go after me so much" He moaned. "All these itchy bites, My God!"

"Yes, my Son?" replied Dad, from behind a cloud.

"Dad - what's up with mosquitoes?!? What were you thinking on that sixth day!"

"Hey, hey Jesus" God retorted. "I created all sorts of stuff and saw that not all of it was 'good', so I instigated a quality control process. Go talk to Noah!"

Jesus did just that but Noah just passed the buck. "Hey I drowned as many things as I could, but your Dad hadn't created mosquito netting yet. Those annoying little buggers almost made me swear off religion!"

Covered in bites, the Lord was getting pretty shirty, when he ran into St Francis of Assisi. "You are an absolute muppet, Frank!" He exploded. "Here I am, the Son of God, and I can't get a decent night's sleep or walk through my Father's creation without being accosted by mozzies! I get that you're the patron saint of all living creatures, but why couldn't you look the other way when it came to mosquitoes?!?" He pleaded.

"Wow, Jesus do you not get the internet in your corner of Heaven?" asked St Francis. "I hate mozzies as much as the next guy, that's why I snaffled up the new Personal Sonic Insect Repeller from Zazz. Nobody dies, so I'm in the clear with your Dad and get to keep my patron saint business cards!"

"SO THAT'S ALL I NEEDED ALL ALONG?!?" screamed Jesus. "THE PERSONAL SONIC INSECT REPELLER?!? MY GOD!!!"

"Yes, my Son" came the voice from the cloud.

"Shutup Dad!" muttered Jesus under his breath.

"Haha, don't get the grumps! I created everything! Including Zazz! I'm totally awesome!" God 1, Jesus 0.

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